My mind won’t stop running. School. Stress. Work. Stress. Money. Stress. Family. Stress. Relationships. Stress.
Breathe. Wait, I think I forgot how.
Just when I think I can get a grip on everything in front of me, something else is added to my plate and I become overwhelmed. I can feel the pressure in my chest.
Have you ever reached that tipping point? You know, when your cup has runneth over? It’s happened enough in my life that I’ve given up on counting. My shoulders become tense, and I feel like I’m walking around like the Hunchback of Notre Dame. My eyes droop low from sleepless nights of tossing and turning. Sometimes, I feel like if I cry and let it all out, it will be okay but there seems to be a wall that stops my emotions from being released.
The only way I can get through my breaking point is to break down the imaginary wall and let it all out. At one point, I disliked crying because I did it so much in the past. I resented seeing myself in tears. I never wanted to appear weak, especially to others.
Today, I no longer consider it weak because even the strongest people can have a breakdown of emotions. Shit, Superman has kryptonite and Joseline Hernandez has Stevie (that’s for my Love and Hip-Hop Atlanta fans). What I experience when I cry is being vulnerable, and there is not a damn thing wrong with that.
We assume people are perfect and Missy Elliot (or Misdemeanor if you prefer) made it clear that “Nobody’s Perfect”. Growing up, Missy is a woman that I admired because of her strength and unique personality.
But being unique does not mean that she doesn’t deal with the everyday stress of life which can be stressful and filled with anxiety. Not long ago, Missy was diagnosed with Graves’ Disease, which is an autoimmune disease that affects the thyroid. This disease is a huge reason she has lost a major amount of weight and chose to live a healthier lifestyle. It is also the reason she struggled with the idea of going back into the limelight.
In a recent interview with Billboard, she expresses her panic attack just before her performance with Katy Perry during the Superbowl, 2015. “Like, IVs in my arm, everything,” she says, “Nobody knew.” The day of the show, she remembers being just offstage and hearing the opening riff of “Get Ur Freak On.” “I said, ‘If I can get over this step, then I know all my dance steps will be on point,’” she recalls. “I know it was nothing but the grace of God that lifted me up and took me through that performance.”
We tend to go through the motions of life, but sometimes we forget we are spirits walking the Earth to prove a purpose. A purpose that God trusted we would learn and follow.
We are so consumed by the struggles of today’s society that we forget that none of the material and egotistical things that we call important really matter. We fail to realize that at the end of the day, our spirit leaves the Earth and everything else remains. The Lord watches us and I can only imagine how much he shakes his head as we run around with this thing we call stress.
In my opinion, Stress does not exist. It’s something we’ve made up over the years. What people call stress is actually fear, as in something we’re scared of. So, when you say you’re stressed, the question you should be asking is “what are you afraid of?” Not getting everything done in time? Not being good enough? Whatever it is, you must get to the bottom of it.
A friend of my mother helped me understand that stress was fear when my mom told her about my past anxieties. “Stress means you’re scared of something,” she explains. “There is no reason a girl as beautiful, sweet, and most of all, who believes in God should be scared of anything”.
She’s right. What is there to be afraid of? If you fear anything, then talk to God. There is no problem in the world that he can’t fix.
When you get anxious over anything, do what Missy did and put your faith in the Lord because He knows what to do. Sometimes it takes a breakdown for us to feel better but we must soon than later, pull ourselves to the table, pray, and eat from the plate of excellence with no pressure.
A bilingual (Spanish & English speaking) full-time Business Marketing student, aspiring singer, and Jesus-lover addicted to Shea Moisture products.