I’m An Entrepreneur Bitch ?

Print Girl: Chronicles & Mentorship Tips From A Young Woman In Media

Chapter 9:  I’m an entrepreneur… bitch?

Many people, particularly women (including myself) will get a bad wrap for setting boundaries &/or having expectations. As a result, we are reported as bitc*es, prideful, & or difficult to work with.

When did setting boundaries, having expectations, and refusing to be selective with which brand partnerships become an automatic title for “bitchy” or difficult to work with? More so, when did it become a crime to not go through a particular person or gatekeeper (self-proclaimed or not), within a specific industry or group deem crown one as prideful?

More so, when did it become a crime to decline to go through particular self-proclaimed gatekeepers within a specific industry or group title a person as prideful?

I quickly realized that my reputation came from decisions that I had made while building my business.

As I grew more focused on proving “gatekeepers” wrong (and rubbing it in their pretty little faces), I became less purposeful and more toxic.

Listen, at times you will find yourself in communities or industries filled with people with the boss syndrome or God-complex. The people who believe that they were the ultimate gatekeepers to certain circles and industries you’re breaking into.

And woe, to you if you don’t “kiss the ring” or refuse to follow their “guidance.” If you do, they’d blacklist you in an instant, making it difficult for you to work with people (by simply throwing dirt on your name and labeling you as “difficult to work with” ).

On a very positive note, prospective clients and partners that I worked with were able to push beyond what they heard (many of them dibbled and dabbled in the same circles). In fact, some stated they had read more about my work through reviews and write-ups in the media, thus moving forward to book time to meet with me. My saving grace apart from press write-ups and features had been my portfolio of work (websites, events, revenue reports- some public, and track record) and how consistent I’d been.

Spiritually, I believed that no one could hold my blessings or be gatekeepers to my success.

Nevertheless, the effect that this had on me (mentally), was another story. Somewhere down the line, I grew more focused on proving “gatekeepers” wrong (and rubbing it in their pretty little faces), I became less purposeful and more toxic ( started believing that most were out to get me). Apart from learning how to heal, here is what I learned:

1. DON’T feel guilty or afraid of setting boundaries or expectations

ESPECIALLY when you have years of experience, knowledge, or just a gut feeling, well-documented results and accomplishments to back you up.

Most people will try to guilt you only because they desire to get their way. Don’t be moved by the name calling or the fear of gaining a reputation for the above. DO be moved by the putting your all-around health first.

2.Be gentle

But unapologetic. Enough said.

3.Be flexible 

However, do not be manipulated. People will try to water down your expectations or value to match their appetite. My motto: if you’re not as hungry as me (passionate), then get out of the kitchen. Oh and leave the apron behind.

4. Never fear what people will say

Many talk a lot. But how many are doing? Eventually, those that are making things happen, will stand tall — over the crowd (of noise)…..

5. Have a clear vision and ‘SMART’ goals  

Having clarity will allow you to definitively stand your ground and set boundaries, without feeling guilty.

6. Be honest 

When you’re honest, it’s much more difficult for negativity to stick (when you bullshit, don’t be mad when FLIES and drama stick to you. )

7. Know your worth

equals knowing your stuff.  Get knowledge and wisdom. Setting boundaries come with experience and credibility. Without it? Learn to shut up, gain knowledge, and deliver. Then speak up when the time is right.

8. Understand 

The people who are meant to cut through the noise around you and know you for you, are meant to be there. Consider the “negative” reputation given to you (albeit unwarranted & opinion) a filter from those who don’t take the time to get to know you.

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Hueish is a lifestyle + digital media company focused on featuring the cultures and movements of millennial creators, makers, and entreprenuers.

 

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